I know it’ll never work out. I know I must let go… I know that if I don’t it’ll just ruin something so precious… But why do I still believe? Why do I feel that there’s still hope? The bittersweet dreams, the fervent wish… The inability to let go…

It’s driving me nuts… I think I’m losing it… l must let go… WHY?!!! Why am I like this??!! All my life, why do I have this urge, this irrational need to love?

I despise this so much… I loath that I can’t tell my heart, “Hush you Fool!” I hate that it’s turning me into this monster that’s scorning her so, just because she won’t be mine… It’s not her fault, she’s done no wrong… yet all that anger… all that resentment… WHY??!!!!